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Okay, so where did I leave off? Oh yeah. You can see part 1 of this post where I was crying and feeling sorry for myself. I had an amazing job (albeit, one I was no longer passionate about) , was making a nice living, but I was miserable because my business had grown too large for me to manage it all. I knew I wanted to Refunk full-time but how could I give up my salary that we depended on? Could I give up my fancy title at work, my designer handbags, and pumps and trade them in for paint brushes and thrift stores on a full-time basis? I just didn’t know.
So for 6 months I mulled over the decision. Oh, and did I mention that I cried some more? And I got even more miserable? I weighed the pros and cons. I know what it takes to run a small business… on paper, anyway. I did SBA lending for Chase Bank for many years and helped many small businesses in Oklahoma City get started. I know what it takes. But could I really do it?
So I decided to go for it.
Officially, next Tuesday, June 12th 2012 will be my last day at the bank.
I have booked my schedule so full for the month of June, there is no way I can chicken out now. In the next few weeks I have 3 workshops I am teaching, attending the Haven Blog Conference in Atlanta, and participating as a vendor at Junk Hippy. It was either jump in with both feet or take 2.5 weeks of vacation. So I jumped in.
I am really excited.
I am really scared I will be on food stamps.
I think I will miss the quiet sanctuary that is my office.
I can’t wait to spend a little more time with Axton. (He will be in Mother’s Day Out 3 days/wk.)
I am worried that I will fail right in front of everyone. All 1 million blog readers, thousands of workshops students, and countless interior design and paint purchasing customers.
Mostly I am afraid of failing in front of my son and my family.
I can’t wait to see how I can grow my business when I can actually focus on it rather then giving it my left over time, which can be next to nothing sometimes.
I don’t know what God’s plan is for me. I have prayed about this decision so much. Sometimes, when I am painting furniture it feels like worship. Just me, my thoughts, and God. I ask him why he put me in this position? Is he testing my faithfulness? I’m not saying I am quitting my job because ‘God told me to do it’. I just want to make sure I am doing this for the right reasons. For unselfish ones. It would be a heck of a lot easier to just keep working and shut down Refunk My Junk.
I am just a regular person, a banker for 14 years, a girl who loves to paint and be creative, is passionate about helping people with their furniture painting projects, gets excited about making people’s homes look custom and expensive on a budget, and knows a little bit about running a small business. I am not a painting prodigy or some sort of professionally trained interior decorator. I am just me and this is my life.
There are different kinds of spiritual gifts, but the same Spirit is the source of them all. 5 There are different kinds of service, but we serve the same Lord. 6 God works in different ways, but it is the same God who does the work in all of us. 1 Corinthians 12
I don’t know what God has in store for me. I am trusting in Him and hoping for the best. (And kind of secretly expecting the worst. But that is just my personality! I can’t help it!)
Until now, I have never paid myself one dime from my business. I just kept reinvesting it back into it. To make it better. I occasionally treated myself and my Mom (who is my wonderful workshop assistant) to a pedicure and a dinner out to reward ourselves for our hard work. And that is how I knew it was my passion. I did it for FREE. Because I LOVE it.
And now I get to do what I love everyday. I get to grow something that is my own. I get to make money doing what I love. I couldn’t be more excited.
Thanks for listening to my worried little heart throw up all of this internal conflict onto my blog.
Sometimes you just gotta get it out.
I’m signing off as Allison G., Officially the President, Owner, Artist, and Instructor of Refunk My Junk, Inc.
Oh. And many times I am the janitor too.
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You are amazing and have proven yourself time and time again! You will be great and I am so happy, excited, and full of joy for you!!! I can’t wait to see what is next for you and know you’ve got a ton of people cheering you on 🙂 You go girl!!!
Wow, this gave me chills, in a good way! So happy for you, Alison. I love how you said that sometimes it feels like worship, I relate to that in many ways, about other things. Trust your path. Be happy. Enjoy this packed month!! xoxo
Thank you for sharing your vulnerablity! God does in fact have a plan for Refunk My Junk, as He does for us all. Sometimes, it’s only when we spread out our arms, close our eyes and step forward that we are truly able to finally SEE where He’s leading! (and you are right, painting is worship time for some of us, that’s how He talks to us and gets us to slow down and LISTEN & FEEL His call. Blessings, Sweet Allison!
If he leads you to it, he will lead you through it. All talents are given by God. Congratulations on your full time business.
Allison…boy can i relate!! You will do just fabulously…your heart is in the right place. You’ve committed this to the Lord and he will see you through! Best of everything in your new venture;-) Julie
You will never regret spending more time with Axton, never. If this choice makes you happy then it should make everyone in your family happy, the financial end will work itself out, you’ll see. Good luck with your new adventure!
Your an inspiration. I did to jump in with both feet and took a chance and opened a scrapbooking and craft store in nw oklahoma two months ago. Not knowing the future and not knowing if I’ll will fail but i jumped in. I love what I do. I love your story and your stuff. I have been in Feathered Nest several times wainting to buy your paint and not knowing if I could make creations like you. I would like to take a workshop but with my busy schedule with running the store im not sure when ill have time. Your are welcome to come to nw okla and teach us northwestern girls how its done. I know of peeps that drive clear to the city to buy your paint. I do have booth space available and do consignment if you want to grow to nw oklahoma.
God Bless
Kacie Barnes
Crafts N Scraps & More
Woodward, Oklahoma
Wishing you all the best as you follow your dream. You are an inspiration. I am re-seeking my passion as life to too short to work at something that doesn’t fill you with joy. Money is not everything. God will provide.
Wow! I am so happy you shared your story with us… what an inspiration for other women! 🙂
I knew you would make the best decision for you and your family. We all think at some point we can be wonderwoman, when in fact, there is no real wonderwoman. I understand the hesitation to leave something that you have worked for, enjoy doing, had benefits and paid vacation, but I also agree with you that you owe it to yourself to go full throttle with your passion. You’ve tested the water and are getting bigger and bigger, you have to follow your heart/dream. You never know until you try, and heck, there are always banking jobs coming and going. I think you are going to be able to breathe a little easier and relax a little more while having fun with what you are doing. I’m so excited for you and if you ever need an assistant in addition to your mother, give me a call. You ROCK Allison!!!
Well….you’ve gone an done it and I am so inspired! Truly a follower of Christ and devoted to His passion for you. “Well done, my good and faithful child.” I will be praying for you and your business adventures and don’t forget to enjoy ALL of it!
CONGRATULATIONS!!!! You are an inspiration to everyone who has a dream…..I just found your blog and am hooked. Looking forward to taking this ride with you…..ox mary ann
Hooray for you! I have been surfing blogs checking out chalk paint, and found you! A good cry never hurt anyone and He is always holding you close. Best wishes as you begin your new journey.
I LOVE your new website and evtiyehrng that you do! Such talent:) We have been remolding our whole house for 2.5 years. We have to build our kitchen as our last step in the major renovations! We currently have a temporary one set up! Although our living space could use some help too.
I don’t know how I came to be playing on your blog today – something about a PinParty that I’m starting… google and a nudge to keep reading more, but I needed this post today. Thank you for blogging through your transition and your hopes, dreams and fears. I am in a similar situation right now and your brave words have been a comfort. 🙂
I just discovered you on fb tonight and read through several of your blogs. I’m VERY impressed. I was an educator for 27 years and 5 yrs ago started a business in Yukon. I now have 5! Amazing! If you’d be interested in putting anything in my shop Blessings and Blooms in Yukon–I’d love to talk! I’m impressed you stepped out on faith! You’re a talented lady! God’s best to you
ok–I have no idea why I put 5 businesses?!?! I have 3–I want no more!
So inspiring to read about your personal journey. Thank you for being brave enough to make the leap and to share it with others.
Thanks for stopping by! I see your stuff on Craigslist all the time and you are so talented!