Today I am getting personal and sharing Axton’s birth story with you. I always love hearing other women’s birth stories. The drama and anticipation of a baby’s arrival just sucks me in every time! I am planning on sharing the details of Shepherd’s birth in a few weeks and so I thought it would only be fair to share my other son, Axton’s, arrival as well. When he was born I wasn’t blogging full-time so it will be nice to have all of the details documented here – that way he can come back and read them someday. As much as I blog for you guys I love having our memories on here to reflect on forever!
I am already getting choked up just thinking about the events leading up to Axton’s birthday! Let’s back this train up and start from the beginning. In 2009 Scott and I had been trying to get pregnant for almost 2 years. I would say the first year was a casual “let’s see what happens” sort of trying and the second year was an escalation of monthly worry that we would never be able to have a baby. After several different fertility tests and medications I was exhausted from always focusing on “operation make a baby”. I eventually decided to put our family planning aside and focus on my career. After working at the same bank in Commercial Lending for 8 years I had become burned out and began looking for another job. I was offered a position in Treasury Management with another bank and I was thrilled about starting my new job. I finally felt like something in my life was moving FORWARD!
To my shock 3 days after starting at the new bank I found out I was pregnant. I had to laugh – I had just left a job where I had 12 weeks of maternity leave and awesome benefits and now I was working where I had not even one single vacation day accumulated! None of those details mattered because we were completely thrilled!
Axton’s pregnancy was a rough one. At 14 weeks pregnant, while in Albuquerque, NM for a work trip, in the middle of a meeting with the President of the bank I worked for, I had leaned forward in my chair and felt a huge gush of liquid. I excused myself from the meeting and when I went to the restroom I found I was bleeding lots and lots of bright red blood. I immediately panicked. My boss drove me to the emergency room and I called Scott barely able to choke out the words to tell him something was seriously wrong. Being at the hospital alone, not sure what was happening, with no family and without my husband, was one of the scariest moments of my life. I was admitted to the hospital and after hours of testing and waiting I was finally told I had a 2 centimeter tear in my placenta. I was at the hospital until 3 am and at 6am I boarded a plane back to Oklahoma to see my OBGYN. There were little answers as to what would happen next. I was monitored throughout the remainder of my pregnancy watching closely for early labor, which is the most common side effect of placental tears.
With God’s grace I made it full-term in my pregnancy. The week of my due date I wasn’t dilated and my uterus was locked up like Fort Knox. My doctor ordered an ultrasound and per it’s measurements Axton was weighing a little over 9 pounds. They urged me to schedule a C-Section that weekend because he didn’t want Axton to continue to grow larger and larger and he was convinced I couldn’t deliver a 9 pound baby.
I completely refused a c-section and begged him to give me the weekend to go into labor on my own. He agreed but scheduled me to be induced on Sunday night if I didn’t go into labor on my own over the weekend.
I was determined to go into labor naturally. I spent the entire weekend doing any and every activity to get me to go into labor. I walked for an hour every night – despite the fact that it was mid-July in Oklahoma and almost 100 degrees. I went and had acupressure done on my feet and pressure points. I did some other activities that I won’t mention because it’s meant just for a husband and wife – but is supposed to help get labor started. You get the picture – I was desperate to get the party started naturally.
By Sunday night nothing had worked and we headed to the hospital.
I still wasn’t dilated or effaced so they put cervidil on my cervix and had me stay over night. The next morning at 6am they started the pictocin and meeting our baby boy was officially in my near future!
Fun fact: I had a ordered a custom hospital gown off of Etsy to wear during my delivery. I don’t know why I am not wearing it in this picture, but all of the nurses had to come into my room to see it for themselves. I just couldn’t imagine wearing a ratty old hospital gown during one of the most memorable days of my life. My labor and delivery nurse was amazing and made sure it stayed in pristine condition throughout my entire labor and I am planning on wearing it during this delivery as well!
Anyway, by 12pm I was still only dilated to a 1 but the pictocin was causing me to have extremely painful contractions. My L&D nurse, after a lot of convincing, told me I needed to get my epidural so my body would relax enough to dilate. Say what?!?! Wouldn’t my epidural wear off if I got it so soon? Was I really such a weanie I had to get my epidural while I was only dilated to 1cm?
I ended up trusting her advice and allowed them to administer the epidural. And guess what? It worked like a charm. Soon I was fully dilated and ready to have a baby! After only 30 minutes of pushing I had my brand new baby in my arms.
Axton weighed 8lbs 1oz and was 21 inches long. He had tons of long black hair (yes I had terrible heartburn and I am convinced the old wives tales are true) and he was absolutely perfect in every single way. I remember just staring at him in disbelief that I was going to get to keep him forever. It was a love I had never experienced and only a mother could understand.
Reflecting back on my deliver I was SO glad I didn’t let my doctor convince me to have a c-section. I listened to my gut and stayed true to what I wanted to do. I would have been totally fine with a c-section if that was what needed to happen once I was in labor. I have nothing against c-sections I just personally didn’t feel comfortable electing to have one without a reason. I also still find it funny I got my epidural when I was only dilated to a 1. People usually giggle when I tell them that and probably secretly think I am the biggest wimp. Oh well, maybe I am and I don’t care.
Thinking about my delivery in a few weeks I think I might be even more nervous than before. Maybe it’s because I know what to expect this time around. I hope and pray my delivery experience is as amazing as it was the first time! Whatever happens I can’t wait to see this little guy’s face.
Please don’t judge for being honest but I keep wondering if I will I love him as much as I do Axton?
Yes, I know in my heart I will, but it just seems crazy to imagine.
Will I be able to handle being a Mom of two boys?
I keep envisioning myself boarded up in my house for the next year, walking around pale-faced and lifeless, as a mother of two. Dramatic, I know.
Whatever happens I know he will be loved and cherished and make our family complete and I can’t wait to meet him.